Everyone has a last straw, especially when it comes to partnering with someone to raise kids.
One woman reached her final straw with her husband after their 3-year-old escaped the house and ran away, while her husband mindlessly played video games.
My 3-year-old son escaped and was found naked close to a major highway, and I was on my way back from work when this happened. Where was dad? In the house playing League of Legends.
That was the absolute last straw among the long list of offenses he did. I have 2 children. My daughter is 7 and my son is 3. Both have autism. My husband seems to prioritize his video games more than our children and it makes me angry.
Years ago it was just a one off, situations which didn’t happen nearly as frequently as the now. It started in the middle of lockdown, where I have to work longer hours than usual. We are both gamers. Sometimes I’ll play a little game when I’m off work.
I’m a nurse that works 12-hour shifts. Sometimes a little gaming from time to time won’t hurt. But this man. If he’s not working, he’s gaming. It doesn’t matter when he has 2 small children to look after. He will put on Netflix for them and lock himself in his room.
He missed our daughter’s talent show because of his raid nights in wow and I didn’t find out until after the school called saying she’s still in school(I dropped her off before work) and reminded my husband to attend and be there for her.
He wasn’t. When my daughter was 4, he racked up at least $480 of late pickup fees($60 for every 15 minutes past 6pm she’s not picked up).
Because he forgot to pick up our daughter from daycare and I had to pick her up in the middle of my shift, take her home and give him an earful and made him pay for it.
I lost count at the number of times I cut off the WiFi in the house and at one point straight up cancelled the internet because I was tired of his nonsense. The only time the kids have anything healthy to eat is when I’m making them dinner.
My husband will order pizza and Chinese or anything that can be delivered via Uber eats. I have already told him to stop doing it since both kids are already gaining weight. The absolute last straw was when my 3-year-old son escaped our house when I was at work.
Naked and at 9pm at night. This was the 2nd time he escaped (we were both at home) and since then I installed multiple alarms on every door in the house. He even had a wristband on with our phone number. We live in rural Florida.
We are very close to swamps and highways. I received a call from a cop saying they found him near the freeway. I gave him the address and rushed straight home. Cop outside my home with my son in the back seat.
Cop said he knocked on the door and no one answered, meanwhile I can hear the alarms go off. My husband's car is in the driveway. He’s home. I get inside and what do I find? My husband behind closed doors playing league of legends.
I cut off the internet and hid the router and that’s when he came out and literally saying to me WTF. I told him to go outside, a cop wants to talk to him.
After a brief conversation with the cop, I sent my son to his room and then we have another separate conversation. My husband said that he already put both kids to bed before getting on to play. I told him the same thing I tell him 30 times.
If he’s watching the kids, the game is off. Period. Since it’s come to the point where our own son could have been kidnapped or killed, it’s over. I told him to pack his bags and leave.
Anyone who would endanger their own children over a video game, has a serious problem. I suggested he see a therapist. I love him and I really want to make this marriage work for at the very least our kids.
I’m seriously considering filing for separation while I consider the options. I just learned that FL does not have separation clauses so I’m going to contact a lawyer this week and discuss options for divorce.
People quickly weighed in with their thoughts on the situation.
Mountain_Monitor_262 wrote:
You’re going to need that police report to prove he’s neglectful when you file for full custody in your divorce. You’ll need to document the hours that he’s put into his gaming.
If he didn’t care about the incident with the police and your son then he will just continue and won’t bother to solve his problem. Why would you want this marriage to work with him? He doesn’t care about his marriage or his kids. Your son could have been killed.
yellow_02 wrote:
Your last paragraph is worrisome. I'm sorry, but your husband is awful. He is neglectful. If your son would've been severely hurt, would you still be considering staying with this guy?
He is not responsible in any way and you are being complacent IF you stay with him and allow your children to be neglected even more.
knit_stitch_ride wrote:
If you don't leave this man, here's what the headlines will say next time: 'Florida child eaten alive. Mom left child with father despite previous neglect.'
BeltalowdaOPA22 wrote:
You absolutely should separate. I'm sure you love him, but is loving him worth your children's safety? Is staying with him worth their lives?
This has been an ongoing issue and he has not changed, so I don't know why you think he's going to change now. If you continue to stay with him and something happens to your kids because of his negligence, it is also your negligence.
You know that he is a danger to your children and if you continue to ignore it, it will be just as much your fault as is if your children are hurt or killed.
Sadly, it seems pretty clear that OP has to figure out how to separate from her husband for the safety of the children, and for her own mental well-being. Hopefully, she receives IRL support to lighten that load.