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<h2>Weddings can be beautifully planned, gorgeous and romantic celebrations of love, but they can also be an obstacle course of big white chaos...</h2><p>Even couples who think they can avoid the stress of modern weddings and opt for a small backyard, BYOB ceremony can find themselves caught up in every extended family member still making their &quot;special day&quot; about themselves. The bachelor and bachelorette parties, bridal showers, passive aggressive group chats, plus ones, kids throwing expensive catered food all over the dance floor--sometimes the flower-fueled frenzy of spending a year planning an event that only lasts about six hours of your life can bring out the worst in families and couples.</p><p>While most &quot;wedding laws&quot; are generally agreed upon such as &quot;don&#39;t do anything to steal the attention away from the couple getting married,&quot; &quot;don&#39;t wear white,&quot; or &quot;don&#39;t blackout at the open bar and fall asleep inside the photobooth, Lisa,&quot; there are some debatable rules. Is it a serious faux pas for the mother-of-the-groom and the mother-of-the-bride to wear matching dresses? Will the whole wedding impode if you show up in a dress that&#39;s an identical shade to the bridesmaids?</p><div className="ad-splitter"></div><p>So, when a frustrated mother-of-the-groom decided to consult the moral compass of the internet otherwise known as Reddit&#39;s &quot;Am I the As*hole?&quot; about a debatable code of wedding etiquette, people were there to help deem a verdict.</p><h2><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/npdm96/aita_for_picking_my_mother_of_the_groom_dress/">AITA</a> (Am I the As*hole) for picking my mother-of-the-groom dress before the mother-of-the-bride?</h2><blockquote> <p>My (52F) son, Mark (27M) is getting married next spring. His fiance, Allie (26F), is great and very laid back and calm about the wedding and the details. My husband and I are paying for a lot of the wedding if that matters. Allie got her dress about 2 months ago so now it is her Mother&#39;s turn to pick a dress. The thing is her Mother Diane (59) can be a bit difficult.</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>I mentioned that I would like to start shopping for mine sooner rather than later because my husband and I spend the winter at our second home in another state. I would like to have the dress in and alterations done before we leave. We do usually return for both Thanksgiving and again for Christmas but we are usually busy during this time and trying to fit in alterations could prove to be difficult. Her mother said she probably won&#39;t be picking out a dress until the fall at the earliest.</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><blockquote> <p>I had Diane and Allie over for lunch a few days later so we could plan a few of the details and again mentioned that I would like to start looking for dresses. Allie said no problem and we could go shopping the following weekend. Diane only said that it was proper etiquette for her to get her dress first.</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>I agreed and said she should come too. She refused and said she wants to wait. I asked her if she knew what color or style she wanted and she gave me a list of pretty much every color that would complement the bridesmaids&#39; dresses. Allie asked her to pick 3 colors which she did.</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>Allie, my daughter, and I went shopping a few weeks ago and I found a great dress that is perfect for the wedding. I ordered it and everyone was happy. Diane called me this morning and said she found a dress and when she sent it to Allie, it was the same color as mine (not one of the 3 colors she picked) and that she would like me to pick a new dress.</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><blockquote> <p>I politely declined because the dress was expensive and not returnable. She then suggested I use it when my daughter gets married (she is not engaged or in a serious relationship so I have no idea if or when or what type of wedding she would have). I do not want to cause problems but I feel like I gave her the colors she wanted and the chance to buy her dress first, both of which she declined. So AITA for not following this etiquette?</p> </blockquote><h2>Here&#39;s what the jury of internet strangers had to say:</h2><blockquote> <p>NTA (Not the As*hole). I have never heard of the MOTB having to pick her dress before the MOTG. Also, it&#39;s not like she didn&#39;t know you wanted to go shopping for one already. - PadawanJoone</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>NTA and it&#39;s sad that weddings have become so much about these ridiculous details, instead of people coming together to celebrate the couple. Not sure who came up with some &quot;rule&quot; about the order of dress selection but it&#39;s silly. - RB1327</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><blockquote> <p>Good lord, NTA. This woman can be a little difficult, you say? No kidding. She&#39;s intentionally making this difficult. I&#39;m planning a wedding now too, and it sounds like your future DIL and I feel similarly about it: these details aren&#39;t important. Wear your dress. Her mother is also free to wear the dress she bought, if she wants. There will be relatively few pictures that contain both of you, and surely you&#39;ll be separated by at least a couple people. No one else will care even a little what you&#39;re wearing. - MungotheSquirrel</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>NTA and frankly I&rsquo;ve never heard of this being a tradition. I feel like she is just trying to cause drama, especially since she decided not to go with the colors she told you she was going to pick from. I&rsquo;ve honestly never heard of the mothers&rsquo; dresses being a big deal at all. I hope you rock that dress! - Nikkig-r</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><blockquote> <p>NTA. She took her sweet time and gave up the chance to have the pick of any dress she wanted. Allie was happy with your choice, that&rsquo;s all that matters - Unsolicitedadvice13</p> </blockquote><h2>So, there you have it!</h2><p>Everyone agreed that this Mother of the groom wouldn&#39;t be wrong at all to keep the dress she chose especially after avoiding the original colors. Diane, however, needs a serious reality check. Good luck, everyone!</p><div className="ad-splitter"></div>

Mother of the Groom asks if she 'broke etiquette' by buying dress before bride's mom.

Weddings can be beautifully planned, gorgeous and romantic celebrations of love, but they can also be an obstacle course of big white chaos...Even couples who think they can avoid the stress of modern weddings and opt for a small backyard, BYOB ceremony can find themselves caught up in every extended family member still making their &quot;special day&quot; about themselves. The bachelor and bachelorette parties, bridal showers, passive aggressive group chats, plus ones, kids throwing expensive catered food all over the dance floor--sometimes the flower-fueled frenzy of spending a year planning an event that only lasts about six hours of your life can bring out the worst in families and couples.While most &quot;wedding laws&quot; are generally agreed upon such as &quot;don&#39;t do anything to steal the attention away from the couple getting married,&quot; &quot;don&#39;t wear white,&quot; or &quot;don&#39;t blackout at the open bar and fall asleep inside the photobooth, Lisa,&quot; there are some debatable rules. Is it a serious faux pas for the mother-of-the-groom and the mother-of-the-bride to wear matching dresses? Will the whole wedding impode if you show up in a dress that&#39;s an identical shade to the bridesmaids?So, when a frustrated mother-of-the-groom decided to consult the moral compass of the internet otherwise known as Reddit&#39;s &quot;Am I the As*hole?&quot; about a debatable code of wedding etiquette, people were there to help deem a verdict.AITA (Am I the As*hole) for picking my mother-of-the-groom dress before the mother-of-the-bride? My (52F) son, Mark (27M) is getting married next spring. His fiance, Allie (26F), is great and very laid back and calm about the wedding and the details. My husband and I are paying for a lot of the wedding if that matters. Allie got her dress about 2 months ago so now it is her Mother&#39;s turn to pick a dress. The thing is her Mother Diane (59) can be a bit difficult.  I mentioned that I would like to start shopping for mine sooner rather than later because my husband and I spend the winter at our second home in another state. I would like to have the dress in and alterations done before we leave. We do usually return for both Thanksgiving and again for Christmas but we are usually busy during this time and trying to fit in alterations could prove to be difficult. Her mother said she probably won&#39;t be picking out a dress until the fall at the earliest.  I had Diane and Allie over for lunch a few days later so we could plan a few of the details and again mentioned that I would like to start looking for dresses. Allie said no problem and we could go shopping the following weekend. Diane only said that it was proper etiquette for her to get her dress first.  I agreed and said she should come too. She refused and said she wants to wait. I asked her if she knew what color or style she wanted and she gave me a list of pretty much every color that would complement the bridesmaids&#39; dresses. Allie asked her to pick 3 colors which she did.  Allie, my daughter, and I went shopping a few weeks ago and I found a great dress that is perfect for the wedding. I ordered it and everyone was happy. Diane called me this morning and said she found a dress and when she sent it to Allie, it was the same color as mine (not one of the 3 colors she picked) and that she would like me to pick a new dress.  I politely declined because the dress was expensive and not returnable. She then suggested I use it when my daughter gets married (she is not engaged or in a serious relationship so I have no idea if or when or what type of wedding she would have). I do not want to cause problems but I feel like I gave her the colors she wanted and the chance to buy her dress first, both of which she declined. So AITA for not following this etiquette? Here&#39;s what the jury of internet strangers had to say: NTA (Not the As*hole). I have never heard of the MOTB having to pick her dress before the MOTG. Also, it&#39;s not like she didn&#39;t know you wanted to go shopping for one already. - PadawanJoone  NTA and it&#39;s sad that weddings have become so much about these ridiculous details, instead of people coming together to celebrate the couple. Not sure who came up with some &quot;rule&quot; about the order of dress selection but it&#39;s silly. - RB1327  Good lord, NTA. This woman can be a little difficult, you say? No kidding. She&#39;s intentionally making this difficult. I&#39;m planning a wedding now too, and it sounds like your future DIL and I feel similarly about it: these details aren&#39;t important. Wear your dress. Her mother is also free to wear the dress she bought, if she wants. There will be relatively few pictures that contain both of you, and surely you&#39;ll be separated by at least a couple people. No one else will care even a little what you&#39;re wearing. - MungotheSquirrel  NTA and frankly I&rsquo;ve never heard of this being a tradition. I feel like she is just trying to cause drama, especially since she decided not to go with the colors she told you she was going to pick from. I&rsquo;ve honestly never heard of the mothers&rsquo; dresses being a big deal at all. I hope you rock that dress! - Nikkig-r  NTA. She took her sweet time and gave up the chance to have the pick of any dress she wanted. Allie was happy with your choice, that&rsquo;s all that matters - Unsolicitedadvice13 So, there you have it!Everyone agreed that this Mother of the groom wouldn&#39;t be wrong at all to keep the dress she chose especially after avoiding the original colors. Diane, however, needs a serious reality check. Good luck, everyone!

Weddings can be beautifully planned, gorgeous and romantic celebrations of love, but they can also be an obstacle course of big white chaos...  Even couples who think they can avoid the stress of modern weddings and opt for a small...