Senator Ted Cruz, the bongo-playing octopus from Aquaman, has a beard now, and it's been widely praised for helping to obscure his facial features.
The proudly bearded Texan wants you to know that not only does he have a beard, he also has at least one friend(?), and the friend is currently studying at a yeshiva in Israel, where a rabbi has chimed in (??) on the state of Cruz's face.
Cruz insists that according to this rabbi, his beard evokes the wisdom of the great Jewish scholars. He also takes it as a compliment that his face puts "fear of the Lord into Israel's enemies," and could be the thing that is so universally loathed it brings Israelis and Palestinians together.