There is no textbook on how to deal with a loved one getting terminal cancer, it's a situation too devastating and complex to boil down to a simple emotional recipe.
Still, while there isn't a right way to be there for a loved one fighting cancer, there are a few wrong ways to handle it. Making their illness about yourself, and undermining their pain are just a few of the worst ways to handle the shock of cancer.
Sadly, prickly family dynamics don't simply disappear when a family member gets cancer. In many cases, the illness heightens tensions and emotional disparities that were already there. The looming presence of loss can serve as a blacklight exposing the ugliest attitudes that haven't been interrogated or healed. In these dark moment, family members who function as mediators often end up working overtime to keep the peace.
AITA for going off on my sister, who has fertility issues, because she thinks that is the same thing (or worse) as my other sister who has cancer?