Woman asks if she was wrong to ditch husband after surgery when he called her 'ugly.'

While videos of people coming out of surgery can be hilarious rants about unicorns or other wisdom-tooth removal nonsense, sometimes you don't need to hear the person you vowed to love forever tell you that your forehead is a 'baby whale.'

So when a conflicted woman decided to consult the moral compass of the internet otherwise known as Reddit's 'Am I the As*hole' about her husband's post-surgery comment, people were quick to help deem a verdict.

AITA (Am I the As*hole) for leaving the hospital and going home after my husband called me ugly while waking up from his surgery?

My (F25) Husband (M32) had undergone a surgery days ago. The surgery required anesthesia and his family and I waited until the evening for him to wake up. He was in and out for a while, but then started regaining conscious gradually. The nurse gave me the signal to go in with his mom.

I stood by his bed and he was speaking to his mom, He then turned his head towards me, made a face and asked who I was. I told him my name but he couldn't recognize me (don't know if this was deliberate) I told him I was his wife and he frowned and said 'no...no you can't be my wife....you're ugly.'

This made me upset and I was completely floored at what he said. I didn't know what to say I just stared at him while he looked away. I quietly stepped out and told his family and mom that I was going home. His mom kept shouting after me saying I was overreacting and that I shouldn't just go home and leave her son alone when he was just waking up.

I got home. Cried my eyes out then called my dad. He calmed me down but then said that I should stop being too sensitive and that my husband didn't know what he was saying and so he didn't mean it, and probably couldn't control it.

I argued that he must really think I'm ugly since I heard that people under the affect of anesthesia are like drunk people and tell what's really on their mind. Dad laughed at this and said that still, walking out like that probably wasn't ideal and it must've had upset my in-laws and my mother in-law.

I admit being too cautious and insecure about my look, I don't see myself pretty so I don't expect him to lie and say I am but calling me ugly? This I couldn't let go.

If 'a drunk man's words are a sober man's thoughts,' does that count for a recovering husband brutally roasting his own wife?

Hearing your partner call you unattractive, even if they are in an altered state that makes most people goofy and confused versions of themselves, is a true nightmare. It's unfair for her family and in-laws to say she's overreacting as she has every right to process her feelings however she sees fit. Still, a conversation with her husband when he recovers is probably necessary considering her other insecurities.

The jury of internet strangers were here to help:

chill_stoner_0604 said:

While your feelings are valid, your dad also has a point that anesthesia can make you think and say all kinds of weird sh*t. When I woke up from my wisdom teeth being pulled I thought my mom was an alien.

TheRunningMD said:

YTA (You're the As*hole) for sure. Anesthesia isn’t a truth serum, you are high as shit and say crazy things, not things you actually think. When I woke up after surgery I told the nurse that “I am the pirate king.' I’m really truly sorry about your insecurities, but leaving your husband at a medical time of need is really bad and unfair to him.

McCretin said:

YTA. Obviously it was an upsetting comment. But your husband was so out of it that he didn't recognize his own wife - surely you see that you can't hold him accountable for what he said in that condition? I once saw a guy wake up from anesthesia and immediately try to attack his mum. It makes people do crazy things. It can even cause hallucinations, which is maybe why he said what he did. Also, think carefully about his comment. He said his wife isn't ugly. If an ugly person couldn't be his wife, that means he thinks his wife (you) is not ugly. Does that make sense?

happybanana134 said:

YTA. Anesthesia is not like being drunk. When I came out of it, I shook my mother's hand and said 'good job doctor'. Had no idea where I was let alone who I was speaking to. Don't take it personally. When it comes down to it, harsh as this is, your husband's health needs to come ahead of your hurt feelings in this instance.

Ok_Newspaper7676 said:

My daughter had a small op a few years ago. The lady in the next cubicle thought Michael Jackson was sitting next to her. The nurses were cracked up as its normally Elvis they see.

So, there you have it!

While the opinions were already mixed here, most people agreed that this woman shouldn't take her husband's comments too seriously as coming out of surgery can make you think your own face is a clown dancing on a dolphin. Good luck, everyone!