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<h2>Dividing housework and childcare can be a challenging point of tension, especially when everyone involved has a dramatically different work schedule...</h2><p>So, when a conflicted woman decided to consult the moral compass of the internet otherwise known as Reddit&#39;s &quot;Am I the As*hole?&quot; about whether or not she was wrong to compare incomes with her soon-to-be-husband, people were there to help deem a verdict.</p><h2><a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/ngtbxt/aita_for_putting_down_my_fianc%C3%A9_for_making_less/">AITA</a> (Am I the As*hole) for putting down my fianc&eacute; for making less money?</h2><blockquote> <p>Me (23) &amp; my fianc&eacute; (25) live together. We have an almost one year old daughter. I work an office job, that is currently at home. My fianc&eacute; works a blue collar job that has him walking a lot.</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>Me and my SO more or less split chores but mine are the ones that get done daily (cooking, dishes, etc) and his are once a week (taking out trash). I wouldn&rsquo;t mind that, since my job is less physically demanding.</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>But I do ALL the child care. She&rsquo;s on a really weird sleep schedule right now, so me and my daughter fall asleep at 1-2am, SO leaves at 7am and then she&rsquo;s back up until I go to work at 11:30 and then she&rsquo;s off with my grandma for the day.</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><blockquote> <p>SO gets out at 4pm. But he goes to go take a nap at his mom&#39;s house until I get out. He&rsquo;ll go get our daughter, bring her home, hand her off to me at 8pm when I finally get out. And he goes to play VIDEO GAMES BECAUSE HE&#39;S SO TIRED AND HAD A STRESSFUL DAY.</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>So I then have to cook with her just watching me. (Dinner doesn&rsquo;t get done until about 9-10) and then I never get to finish all my chores because she gets upset not being able to play.</p> </blockquote><p> </p><blockquote> <p>Even on Fridays when he doesn&rsquo;t work, I still have to put her to sleep and he acts like an as*hole if I wake him up to feed her. So I called him out and asked why his sleep and comfort is more important than mine. He said &ldquo;Because my job is a real job. All you do is sit down all day.&rdquo; Also, my job is not easy. It is mentally exhausting and really f*cking hard.</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><p> </p><blockquote> <p>So, I said &ldquo;Okay, let&rsquo;s compare paychecks and see who has the real job.&rdquo; I make almost double what he makes. He&rsquo;s been in a mood and I didn&rsquo;t feel like an as*hole at first but when I told my friend what had happened, she said that you&rsquo;re not supposed to brag about making more money and that is was a rude thing to do. Especially to a guy since they&rsquo;re supposed to be the providers.</p> </blockquote><h2>Here&#39;s what the jury of internet strangers had to say:</h2><blockquote> <p>NTA (Not the As*hole) your fianc&eacute; needs to get their head out their a*s and grow up. - Milk_is_amazing</p> </blockquote><p> </p><blockquote> <p>NTA I&#39;m so sick of these partners who are totally disengaged with sharing life, sharing home responsibilities and most of all sharing parenting. - Agreeable_Tale1305</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><p> </p><blockquote> <p>NTA. I mean, maybe a little bit of an as*hole for calling it a &#39;real job&#39; in a heated moment (all jobs are real and worked by someone just trying to earn a living, no matter the wage) but the numbers don&#39;t lie and clearly you&#39;re at the end of your rope. You&#39;re bringing in twice as much and running a household with a 1 year old in it? Like damn.</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>You already have one kid, you do not need another that naps at his mother&#39;s house at 4pm. He needs to buck up, down an afternoon coffee and be a real partner and father to your child. - Bethievingsouls</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>NTA. You provide for the family financially, do all the parenting, do all the daily chores, and he hides at other people&#39;s houses to take naps or hides in another room to play videogames then wants to justify his negligible input by telling you his job is real and yours isn&#39;t?</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><blockquote> <p>I think it&#39;s totally reasonable to ask him how he drew that conclusion and emphasize the objective valuing of each of your jobs: the amount you&#39;re paid to do them.</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>If your job is so easy and not even a real job, why does it pay so much? If the physical effort and mental effort you put in to performing your tasks makes it a real job, why doesn&#39;t he value the full time job you have raising his kid, running his house and cooking his meals? I would be re-evaluating the value of this relationship tbh. - ElephantJuiceYoyo</p> </blockquote><p> </p><blockquote> <p>NTA. He played the &quot;I have a real job&quot;-card and brought this onto himself.<br /> Every job is a real job and he is not entitled to act like a total a-hole just because his is physical. Your SO needs to grow up and own up to the task he has to do as a partner an a father. If he does not want to do that now he should have thought about that earlier. - nexutus</p> </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><blockquote> <p>NTA. You already have a baby, don&rsquo;t marry one, too. He&rsquo;s acting like a spoiled child instead of like a partner and parent. You&rsquo;re doing almost all of the childcare and domestic labor while he naps and plays video games. He needs to step it up instead of being butthurt.</p> </blockquote><blockquote> <p>He should be doing everything he can to make sure you&rsquo;re the one who is well rested and supported at home because it would be a disaster for the family for your total family income to be cut by 2/3 if you lose your job due to exhaustion and home stress. - ghostforest</p> </blockquote><h2>So, there you have it!</h2><p>Everyone agreed that this woman wasn&#39;t wrong at all to snap at her fianc&eacute; and remind him of her income as he needs to step it up around the house and as a parent if he wants to have a successful and happy future. Good luck, everyone!</p><div className="ad-splitter"></div>

Woman asks if she was wrong to bring up income during fight about chores.

Dividing housework and childcare can be a challenging point of tension, especially when everyone involved has a dramatically different work schedule...So, when a conflicted woman decided to consult the moral compass of the internet otherwise known as Reddit&#39;s &quot;Am I the As*hole?&quot; about whether or not she was wrong to compare incomes with her soon-to-be-husband, people were there to help deem a verdict.AITA (Am I the As*hole) for putting down my fianc&eacute; for making less money? Me (23) &amp; my fianc&eacute; (25) live together. We have an almost one year old daughter. I work an office job, that is currently at home. My fianc&eacute; works a blue collar job that has him walking a lot.  Me and my SO more or less split chores but mine are the ones that get done daily (cooking, dishes, etc) and his are once a week (taking out trash). I wouldn&rsquo;t mind that, since my job is less physically demanding.  But I do ALL the child care. She&rsquo;s on a really weird sleep schedule right now, so me and my daughter fall asleep at 1-2am, SO leaves at 7am and then she&rsquo;s back up until I go to work at 11:30 and then she&rsquo;s off with my grandma for the day.  SO gets out at 4pm. But he goes to go take a nap at his mom&#39;s house until I get out. He&rsquo;ll go get our daughter, bring her home, hand her off to me at 8pm when I finally get out. And he goes to play VIDEO GAMES BECAUSE HE&#39;S SO TIRED AND HAD A STRESSFUL DAY.  So I then have to cook with her just watching me. (Dinner doesn&rsquo;t get done until about 9-10) and then I never get to finish all my chores because she gets upset not being able to play.   Even on Fridays when he doesn&rsquo;t work, I still have to put her to sleep and he acts like an as*hole if I wake him up to feed her. So I called him out and asked why his sleep and comfort is more important than mine. He said &ldquo;Because my job is a real job. All you do is sit down all day.&rdquo; Also, my job is not easy. It is mentally exhausting and really f*cking hard.   So, I said &ldquo;Okay, let&rsquo;s compare paychecks and see who has the real job.&rdquo; I make almost double what he makes. He&rsquo;s been in a mood and I didn&rsquo;t feel like an as*hole at first but when I told my friend what had happened, she said that you&rsquo;re not supposed to brag about making more money and that is was a rude thing to do. Especially to a guy since they&rsquo;re supposed to be the providers. Here&#39;s what the jury of internet strangers had to say: NTA (Not the As*hole) your fianc&eacute; needs to get their head out their a*s and grow up. - Milk_is_amazing   NTA I&#39;m so sick of these partners who are totally disengaged with sharing life, sharing home responsibilities and most of all sharing parenting. - Agreeable_Tale1305   NTA. I mean, maybe a little bit of an as*hole for calling it a &#39;real job&#39; in a heated moment (all jobs are real and worked by someone just trying to earn a living, no matter the wage) but the numbers don&#39;t lie and clearly you&#39;re at the end of your rope. You&#39;re bringing in twice as much and running a household with a 1 year old in it? Like damn.  You already have one kid, you do not need another that naps at his mother&#39;s house at 4pm. He needs to buck up, down an afternoon coffee and be a real partner and father to your child. - Bethievingsouls  NTA. You provide for the family financially, do all the parenting, do all the daily chores, and he hides at other people&#39;s houses to take naps or hides in another room to play videogames then wants to justify his negligible input by telling you his job is real and yours isn&#39;t?  I think it&#39;s totally reasonable to ask him how he drew that conclusion and emphasize the objective valuing of each of your jobs: the amount you&#39;re paid to do them.  If your job is so easy and not even a real job, why does it pay so much? If the physical effort and mental effort you put in to performing your tasks makes it a real job, why doesn&#39;t he value the full time job you have raising his kid, running his house and cooking his meals? I would be re-evaluating the value of this relationship tbh. - ElephantJuiceYoyo   NTA. He played the &quot;I have a real job&quot;-card and brought this onto himself. Every job is a real job and he is not entitled to act like a total a-hole just because his is physical. Your SO needs to grow up and own up to the task he has to do as a partner an a father. If he does not want to do that now he should have thought about that earlier. - nexutus  NTA. You already have a baby, don&rsquo;t marry one, too. He&rsquo;s acting like a spoiled child instead of like a partner and parent. You&rsquo;re doing almost all of the childcare and domestic labor while he naps and plays video games. He needs to step it up instead of being butthurt.  He should be doing everything he can to make sure you&rsquo;re the one who is well rested and supported at home because it would be a disaster for the family for your total family income to be cut by 2/3 if you lose your job due to exhaustion and home stress. - ghostforest So, there you have it!Everyone agreed that this woman wasn&#39;t wrong at all to snap at her fianc&eacute; and remind him of her income as he needs to step it up around the house and as a parent if he wants to have a successful and happy future. Good luck, everyone!

Dividing housework and childcare can be a challenging point of tension, especially when everyone involved has a dramatically different work schedule...  So, when a conflicted woman decided to consult the moral compass of the internet...