On February 6th, 20-year-old Kaylee Muthart was found gouging out her eyes outside of a church while in a meth-induced state. Despite her violent delirium, a team of local deputies were eventually able to restrain her long enough to transport her to a trauma unit. It was at this point that her mother, Katy Tompkins, was told she now had a blind daughter.
After spending a few weeks recovering in the hospital and at a nearby psychiatric ward, Muthart was finally welcomed home on March 1, and feels ready to share her new lease on life.
“It’s the same life, but I’m just learning everything in a new way. Life’s more beautiful now, life’s more beautiful than it was being on drugs. It is a horrible world to live in," Muthart told PEOPLE.
While speaking with PEOPLE, Muthart also shared how she came across meth in the first place. Months before the incident, coworkers at an old job offered her marijuana that was laced with either cocaine or meth. Muthart immediately recognized a more extreme high than ever before, and once she confirmed she'd been dosed, quit that job.
Then, at her next job, another coworker pressured her to try meth until she finally caved.
“I took a video while I was on it, and I had been up three days straight. I eventually got taken home and got sober and watched the videos, and put that person out of my life and stopped using the drug."
After a clean spell, Muthart recalls relapsing during a dark time. During that time, she experienced a meth high that brought up hallucinations of God.
"I thought everyone who had died was stuck in their graves, that God was up in Heaven alone, and that I had to sacrifice something important to be able to release everyone in the world to God. It made the world darker, and took everything I believed in and distorted them to make me go down the path to pulling out my eyes," she said.
In the wake of the incident, Muthart is working through the feelings that came up during her period of addiction, as well as her relationship to faith.