There's no convenient time to get in a fight with your partner. However, if you're going to rank 'inconvenient' times to fight with your partner, then right before Christmas hovers at the top of the list.
Ideally, Christmas presents aren't used as leverage to be given and withheld at random. But that doesn't stop them from being used this way.
She wrote:
AITA for returning my husband's Christmas present?
This happened before Christmas, but there is still tension in the house and I just need advice. I 30F have been with my husband 31M for 3 years. We both have children from previous relationships, mine 8F, and his 6M.
My husband started taking away presents from the Christmas tree for the children that he bought them, when the kids misbehave. I didn't really get a say in it since he was the one that bought the presents for the kids.
My daughter has been asking me for months to get her a switch, so I decided to save a bit and buy her one for Christmas. It was sitting under the tree, then suddenly on Christmas Eve, I noticed it was gone.
I asked my daughter if she touched it and she said she didn't, so I decided to turn to my husband. He said that she swore at him while he was trying to get her ready for bed the night before so he decided to punish her and take away the present and return it to the store.
I started seeing red, and demanded he hands me the money back since I was the one that bought that present. He refused, so I grabbed his present from me - a brand new PS5 that he knew he was getting, and returned it.
I got my money back and bought my daughter her switch back. This started a big argument between my husband and I. He called me childish for doing that. He got his family involved and they spammed my phone telling me to get his present back. But I refused. He is still not talking to me, so AITA?
Fuzzy-Constant wrote:
NTA. He's acting unilaterally and returning your present...and then kept the money?! WTF, that's bad co-parenting but also literally stealing! Yikes about this guy. Please don't live in denial about who he is.
javigonay wrote:
First red flag: taking a child's present without speaking to the mother's child. Second red flag: returning said gift to the store. (A normal punishment would be a threat of taking it away, not this).
Third red flag: keeping the money when he was not the one who bought the present. (That's stealing in most parts of the world, no two ways about it).
Fourth red flag: When asking about the money, refusing to return it. (That's confirming that what he did was stealing).
Fifth red flag: involving his family in a domestic dispute. (Big no-no, that is a couple's problem, not a soccer match, no need to take sides).
Sixth red flag: not accepting that OP has the right to be upset and continuing with his a**holery.
Congratulations, you are ready for the Chinese May 1st parade.
Also, what kind of swearing did the 8-eight-year old do?
mdjdiso wrote:
NTA. But I think you should give him an even better Christmas present: a divorce. You guys do not belong in relationships.
sperans-ns wrote:
NTA. So let's be clear here. He returned something that you bought with your own money and kept YOUR money to himself? Let him go buy himself his own gifts. That was stealing, pure and simple. You need to seriously evaluate this relationship. I'm so sorry you are going through this.
Clearly, OP is NTA here, and the issue seems to extend far past a Christmas gift.