Someecards Logo
Woman asks if she's wrong to avoid 'girl talk' with trans co-worker in male dominated office.

Woman asks if she's wrong to avoid 'girl talk' with trans co-worker in male dominated office.


Friendships between co-workers can be incredibly rewarding, but if there's any friction you do have to spend approximately 40 hours a week with them...

Depending on your job and responsibilities, it's sometimes possible to see your co-workers during your waking hours more than you see your partner or children. Having a calm and happy work environment is key to creating quality work, which means even the smallest feuds with co-workers can send the office into a spiral of despair and passive aggressive notes in the break room.

Luckily for all conflicts, we have the "Am I the As*hole?" section of Reddit. When a recent user asked a question about how to approach a problem she's having with her female co-worker in a male-dominated office and industry, people were there for her.

AITA because I don't want "girl talk" with my co-worker?

I'm a 24/f engineer in a small firm where ALL the other engineers were middle aged men until a few months ago. It's been OK. I do feel like I have to be twice as hardworking / productive / competent to get the respect I do. But since I do work very hard it's OK.

There are small issues that make being female hard here. For example the office temperature ranges from 63F to 59F. Every one of them is a sizable man and that's the temp they're comfortable at. I'm petite and wear my coat, hat and fingerless gloves all day. As a "compromise" I can have a space heater at my desk, but as it's open plan, this doesn't do much.

The women's bathroom has a tiny sitting area, and I put another heater there, so I can sit there for a bit and warm up if I have to, which helps.

In October an engineer started transitioning to a woman - "Alan" to "Chloe." Alan had hardly ever talked to me, but my first encounter with her as Chloe was stressful. She started using the women's bathroom and said my heater had to go since she had to do her makeup and it was making her sweat and her makeup run. I said let's discuss it, try to find a compromise, but after I came back from lunch I found the heater unplugged on my desk. I went to ask her what happened, she harshly said the bathroom wasn't my private property and I "needed to start learning to consider others for once in my life." This was basically my first conversation with this person ever!

I thought we'd just avoid each other after that but she actually started acting like we were BFFs. "Us girls" this, and "us girls" that. Whenever I go to the bathroom she'd book it there to start talking to me while I was using the stall, about topics I have no interest in like makeup and clothes.

© Copyright 2021 Someecards, Inc

Featured Content