Sir, I appreciate your honesty and accept your offer. (image via Spencer's Online)
Police arrested a 50-year-old man wearing the above t-shirt after he refused to leave the premises of a park in South Carolina and became belligerent. The man reportedly claimed it was his right to wear the shirt and that "he would wear the shirt any fucking where he wanted to." We have to assume it was laundry day, and his "All This and a Big Dick, Too!" and "Single and Ready to F*ck" t-shirts were in the wash. Then, once the police confronted him, he thought it would be lame to act embarrassed, and decided to defend his choice of shirt as if a grown man should ever wear something like that. But now it's time for him to come clean and admit he made a mistake. Nothing in the Constitution defends your right to dress like a douchebag.