Escaped pig in Michigan terrorizes woman; poops in the last place you should poop.

Escaped pig in Michigan terrorizes woman; poops in the last place you should poop.
Advertising

After a pig went on the run last Thursday, the residents and police of Shelby Township, Michigan better understand the phrase "hog wild."

Escaped pig in Michigan terrorizes woman; poops in the last place you should poop.

And after a trip in a squad car, the pig better understands the phrase "ridin' dirty."
(via Shelby Twp Police on Facebook)

That sassy, happy pig you see above? That pig is also a HARDENED CRIMINAL. Last Thursday, the pig managed to escape from its home in Shelby Township, Michigan, and he proceeded to run around town like the world was his sty. According to CBS Detroit,

...the whole thing started after police received a 911 call around 7 p.m. Thursday, from a woman who said there was a pig on the loose and she didn't know what to do. According to reports, the woman was doing yard work when the pig came barreling toward her. It then chased her into the front yard before getting distracted by a decorative ball.

At least we know that when the eventual war against genetically modified super-pigs begins, we can destroy them with a series of decorative balls and, I assume, Home Alone-style DIY traps.

According to police, capturing the pig was relatively easy — they just used a dog pole. But once the pig was in the squad car, he proceeded to do what most humans know is a very, very bad idea: defecate all over the back of the police cruiser.

This is where you should stop if you don't want to see a bunch of pig poop in a police car, OK?

OK! Here you go:

Advertising

Escaped pig in Michigan terrorizes woman; poops in the last place you should poop.

Add someone vomiting after getting off the Gravitron, and this is like the all worst parts of the county fair in one backseat. (via Shelby Twp Police on Facebook)

Here's a video of the porky perp, taken by the arresting officer:

Advertising

If you have been following our piggy story, you will get a kick out of this. Officer Treworgy just sent me this "post...

Posted by Shelby Township Police Department on Friday, May 29, 2015
Advertising