Politics

<p>Like all funny stories, this one starts at the Senate Judiciary Hearing where Attorney General Jeff Sessions was testifying on committee oversight of the Justice Department blah blah blah.</p><p>When it was Senator Ben Sasse&#39;s (R-NE) turn to grill (well, as much as a Republican would) Sessions, Sasse says he was momentarily interrupted because he <a href="https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/politics/onpolitics/2017/10/18/sen-ben-sasse-spills-dr-pepper-sen-ted-cruz-senate-judiciary-committee-hearing/776551001/?utm_source=feedblitz&amp;utm_medium=FeedBlitzRss&amp;utm_campaign=usatodaycomwashington-topstories">&quot;dumped a Dr. Pepper on Senator Cruz.&quot;</a></p><div class="oembedall-container sec-iframe sec-oembed-iframe"><blockquote class="twitter-tweet"><p lang="en" dir="ltr">I think this is an experience we all wish we could have<br><br>Sen. Sasse: I dumped a Dr. Pepper on Sen. Cruz <a href="https://t.co/L5qE43IXLD">pic.twitter.com/L5qE43IXLD</a></p>&mdash; Lis Power (@LisPower1) <a href="https://twitter.com/LisPower1/status/920690002383818754?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">October 18, 2017</a></blockquote> <script async src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js" charset="utf-8"></script></div><div className="ad-splitter"></div><p>People were extremely jealous that Sasse had the opportunity.</p><p>The fun continued on Twitter, when the senator replied to a tweeter calling back to the time President Donald Trump revived the <a href="http://www.politico.com/story/2016/07/trump-ted-cruz-jfk-assassination-226020">conspiracy theory that Ted Cruz&#39;s dad killed JFK. </a></p><figure class="image"><div class="image-container"><img alt="" data-attribution="twitter" data-attribution-url="https://twitter.com/BenSasse/status/920705700124381185" height="472" src="//cdn.someecards.com/posts/screen-shot-2017-10-18-at-21315-pm-GHLVoK.png" width="700" /></div><div class="image-attribution"><a href="https://twitter.com/BenSasse/status/920705700124381185">twitter</a></div></figure><div className="ad-splitter"></div><p>To which Cruz responded with a reference to another viral theory: that he himself <a href="https://www.someecards.com/news/tweet-picks/ted-cruz-zodiac-killer/">is the Zodiac Killer.</a></p><div class="oembedall-container sec-iframe sec-oembed-iframe"><blockquote class="twitter-tweet"><p lang="und" dir="ltr"> <a href="https://t.co/CRKdrSDWes">pic.twitter.com/CRKdrSDWes</a></p>&mdash; Ted Cruz (@tedcruz) <a href="https://twitter.com/tedcruz/status/920709146789515272?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">October 18, 2017</a></blockquote> <script async src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js" charset="utf-8"></script></div><div className="ad-splitter"></div><p>It&#39;s his wildest day on Twitter since the time he <a href="https://www.someecards.com/news/so-that-happened/ted-cruz-porn-twitter/">publicly liked a porno on 9/11. </a></p><p>He also was determined to ban Sasse from his Dr. Pepper reserves.</p><div class="oembedall-container sec-iframe sec-oembed-iframe"><blockquote class="twitter-tweet"><p lang="en" dir="ltr">MEMO TO OFFICE: <br><br>Please place a picture of <a href="https://twitter.com/BenSasse?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">@BenSasse</a> above the <a href="https://twitter.com/drpepper?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">@drpepper</a> fridge in our lobby. <br><br>He is now cut off. <a href="https://t.co/C9tj5wQ6tD">https://t.co/C9tj5wQ6tD</a> <a href="https://t.co/6PH6HCFSoJ">pic.twitter.com/6PH6HCFSoJ</a></p>&mdash; Ted Cruz (@tedcruz) <a href="https://twitter.com/tedcruz/status/920696038259904512?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">October 18, 2017</a></blockquote> <script async src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js" charset="utf-8"></script></div><div className="ad-splitter"></div><p>The internet is trying to cope with this overflow of Politicians Trying To Be Cool.</p><div class="oembedall-container sec-iframe sec-oembed-iframe"><blockquote class="twitter-tweet"><p lang="en" dir="ltr">ME: You&#39;re the Zodiac Killer.<br><br>TED CRUZ: No, I&#39;m not!<br><br>ME: OK, you&#39;re that Senator who jerked off.<br><br>TED CRUZ: ...ok I&#39;m the Zodiac Killer.</p>&mdash; Jesse McLaren (@McJesse) <a href="https://twitter.com/McJesse/status/920714848190828546?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">October 18, 2017</a></blockquote> <script async src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js" charset="utf-8"></script></div><div className="ad-splitter"></div><oembed>https://twitter.com/HeathMayo/status/920688457793589248</oembed><div className="ad-splitter"></div><div class="oembedall-container sec-iframe sec-oembed-iframe"><blockquote class="twitter-tweet"><p lang="en" dir="ltr">the first likable thing <a href="https://twitter.com/tedcruz?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">@tedcruz</a> has ever done is admitting he&#39;s the zodiac killer <br><br>THINK ABOUT THAT</p>&mdash; Yael (@yaeltime) <a href="https://twitter.com/yaeltime/status/920712289984098304?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">October 18, 2017</a></blockquote> <script async src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js" charset="utf-8"></script></div><div className="ad-splitter"></div><div class="oembedall-container sec-iframe sec-oembed-iframe"><blockquote class="twitter-tweet"><p lang="en" dir="ltr">CRUZ NEWS: TEXAN TWEETS NOTED NOTE, THREATENS SASSY SASSE WITH ZODIAC ATTACK</p>&mdash; Hayes Brown (@HayesBrown) <a href="https://twitter.com/HayesBrown/status/920714033556328454?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">October 18, 2017</a></blockquote> <script async src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js" charset="utf-8"></script></div><div className="ad-splitter"></div><div class="oembedall-container sec-iframe sec-oembed-iframe"><blockquote class="twitter-tweet"><p lang="en" dir="ltr">&quot;Dumping a Dr. Pepper on Ted Cruz&quot; sounds like filthy slang for &quot;watching Twitter porn.&quot;</p>&mdash; Brook Lundy (@brooklundy1) <a href="https://twitter.com/brooklundy1/status/920710884972007436?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">October 18, 2017</a></blockquote> <script async src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js" charset="utf-8"></script></div><div className="ad-splitter"></div><p> </p><div> <blockquote class="twitter-tweet" data-conversation="none" data-lang="en"> <p dir="ltr" lang="en">good luck tonight ted <a href="https://t.co/lxFLTaO7l1">pic.twitter.com/lxFLTaO7l1</a></p> &mdash; alt-left schrempf (@zarzarbinkss) <a href="https://twitter.com/zarzarbinkss/status/920710494847209487?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">October 18, 2017</a></blockquote> <script async="" charset="utf-8" src="//platform.twitter.com/widgets.js"></script></div><div class="oembedall-container sec-iframe sec-oembed-iframe"><blockquote class="twitter-tweet"><p lang="en" dir="ltr">Of course Ted Cruz is a serial killer we all saw him get horny on 9/11</p>&mdash; Orli Matlow (@HireMeImFunny) <a href="https://twitter.com/HireMeImFunny/status/920715900659142662?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">October 18, 2017</a></blockquote> <script async src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js" charset="utf-8"></script></div><div className="ad-splitter"></div><div class="oembedall-container sec-iframe sec-oembed-iframe"><blockquote class="twitter-tweet"><p lang="en" dir="ltr">The most impressive part of Ted Cruz tweeting this joke is that he was able to do it with one hand <a href="https://t.co/lSJGdD0D4l">pic.twitter.com/lSJGdD0D4l</a></p>&mdash; Jess Dweck (@TheDweck) <a href="https://twitter.com/TheDweck/status/920717449787559937?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">October 18, 2017</a></blockquote> <script async src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js" charset="utf-8"></script></div><div className="ad-splitter"></div><p> </p><div class="oembedall-container sec-iframe sec-oembed-iframe"><blockquote class="twitter-tweet"><p lang="en" dir="ltr">This is Ted Cruz&#39;s version of Obama doing &quot;Thanks Obama.&quot; <a href="https://t.co/c6u31UNMug">https://t.co/c6u31UNMug</a></p>&mdash; Alp Ozcelik (@alplicable) <a href="https://twitter.com/alplicable/status/920712099038355457?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">October 18, 2017</a></blockquote> <script async src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js" charset="utf-8"></script></div><div className="ad-splitter"></div><div class="oembedall-container sec-iframe sec-oembed-iframe"><blockquote class="twitter-tweet"><p lang="en" dir="ltr">Other conspiracy theory: all Ted Cruz&#39;s &quot;good&quot; tweets are by staffers desperately trying to get fired</p>&mdash; Danny Bowes (@bybowes) <a href="https://twitter.com/bybowes/status/920712559736520706?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">October 18, 2017</a></blockquote> <script async src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js" charset="utf-8"></script></div><div className="ad-splitter"></div><div class="oembedall-container sec-iframe sec-oembed-iframe"><blockquote class="twitter-tweet"><p lang="en" dir="ltr">Cruz-as-Zodiac bit was always a red herring. Real Zodiac was a compulsive, narcissistic liar with bad grammar who&#39;d be over 70 now...<br><br>wait</p>&mdash; Zeddy (@Zeddary) <a href="https://twitter.com/Zeddary/status/920712781372035075?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">October 18, 2017</a></blockquote> <script async src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js" charset="utf-8"></script></div><div className="ad-splitter"></div><p>It&#39;s all fun and games until you see that the tweet before was about denying healthcare subsidies to the poor...the ULTIMATE serial killer move.</p><div class="oembedall-container sec-iframe sec-oembed-iframe"><blockquote class="twitter-tweet"><p lang="en" dir="ltr">Exactly right. Ins co profits have DOUBLED under O&#39;care &amp; Dems top priority is corp bailouts w/ nothing for citizens paying higher premiums. <a href="https://t.co/VY1IwcO9x8">https://t.co/VY1IwcO9x8</a></p>&mdash; Ted Cruz (@tedcruz) <a href="https://twitter.com/tedcruz/status/920703627857223680?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw">October 18, 2017</a></blockquote> <script async src="https://platform.twitter.com/widgets.js" charset="utf-8"></script></div><div className="ad-splitter"></div><p>Just an average day in Trump&#39;s America.</p><div className="ad-splitter"></div>

Ted Cruz just tweeted proof that he's the Zodiac Killer after a senator dumped Dr. Pepper on him. Yup.

Orli Matlow

Like all funny stories, this one starts at the Senate Judiciary Hearing where Attorney General Jeff Sessions was testifying on committee oversight of the Justice Department blah blah blah.When it was Senator Ben Sasse&#39;s (R-NE) turn to grill (well, as much as a Republican would) Sessions, Sasse says he was momentarily interrupted because he &quot;dumped a Dr. Pepper on Senator Cruz.&quot;I think this is an experience we all wish we could haveSen. Sasse: I dumped a Dr. Pepper on Sen. Cruz pic.twitter.com/L5qE43IXLD&mdash; Lis Power (@LisPower1) October 18, 2017 People were extremely jealous that Sasse had the opportunity.The fun continued on Twitter, when the senator replied to a tweeter calling back to the time President Donald Trump revived the conspiracy theory that Ted Cruz&#39;s dad killed JFK. twitterTo which Cruz responded with a reference to another viral theory: that he himself is the Zodiac Killer. pic.twitter.com/CRKdrSDWes&mdash; Ted Cruz (@tedcruz) October 18, 2017 It&#39;s his wildest day on Twitter since the time he publicly liked a porno on 9/11. He also was determined to ban Sasse from his Dr. Pepper reserves.MEMO TO OFFICE: Please place a picture of @BenSasse above the @drpepper fridge in our lobby. He is now cut off. https://t.co/C9tj5wQ6tD pic.twitter.com/6PH6HCFSoJ&mdash; Ted Cruz (@tedcruz) October 18, 2017 The internet is trying to cope with this overflow of Politicians Trying To Be Cool.ME: You&#39;re the Zodiac Killer.TED CRUZ: No, I&#39;m not!ME: OK, you&#39;re that Senator who jerked off.TED CRUZ: ...ok I&#39;m the Zodiac Killer.&mdash; Jesse McLaren (@McJesse) October 18, 2017 https://twitter.com/HeathMayo/status/920688457793589248the first likable thing @tedcruz has ever done is admitting he&#39;s the zodiac killer THINK ABOUT THAT&mdash; Yael (@yaeltime) October 18, 2017 CRUZ NEWS: TEXAN TWEETS NOTED NOTE, THREATENS SASSY SASSE WITH ZODIAC ATTACK&mdash; Hayes Brown (@HayesBrown) October 18, 2017 &quot;Dumping a Dr. Pepper on Ted Cruz&quot; sounds like filthy slang for &quot;watching Twitter porn.&quot;&mdash; Brook Lundy (@brooklundy1) October 18, 2017    good luck tonight ted pic.twitter.com/lxFLTaO7l1 &mdash; alt-left schrempf (@zarzarbinkss) October 18, 2017 Of course Ted Cruz is a serial killer we all saw him get horny on 9/11&mdash; Orli Matlow (@HireMeImFunny) October 18, 2017 The most impressive part of Ted Cruz tweeting this joke is that he was able to do it with one hand pic.twitter.com/lSJGdD0D4l&mdash; Jess Dweck (@TheDweck) October 18, 2017  This is Ted Cruz&#39;s version of Obama doing &quot;Thanks Obama.&quot; https://t.co/c6u31UNMug&mdash; Alp Ozcelik (@alplicable) October 18, 2017 Other conspiracy theory: all Ted Cruz&#39;s &quot;good&quot; tweets are by staffers desperately trying to get fired&mdash; Danny Bowes (@bybowes) October 18, 2017 Cruz-as-Zodiac bit was always a red herring. Real Zodiac was a compulsive, narcissistic liar with bad grammar who&#39;d be over 70 now...wait&mdash; Zeddy (@Zeddary) October 18, 2017 It&#39;s all fun and games until you see that the tweet before was about denying healthcare subsidies to the poor...the ULTIMATE serial killer move.Exactly right. Ins co profits have DOUBLED under O&#39;care &amp; Dems top priority is corp bailouts w/ nothing for citizens paying higher premiums. https://t.co/VY1IwcO9x8&mdash; Ted Cruz (@tedcruz) October 18, 2017 Just an average day in Trump&#39;s America.

Like all funny stories, this one starts at the Senate Judiciary Hearing where Attorney General Jeff Sessions was testifying on committee oversight of the Justice Department blah blah blah.  When it was Senator Ben Sasse&#39;s (R-NE) turn...