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It's President Donald Trump's 71st birthday today, and it surprisingly and sadly has yet to be a national holiday. And with 71 being pretty up there in age, he's likely to declare the passage of time to be "fake news!!!"

Trump will undoubtedly be celebrating with a "beautiful" piece of cake, but hopefully the cake doesn't inspire him to strike Syria again.

People are wishing Dear Leader a blessed day.

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What do you give the man who has everything?

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John Dean of Watergate fame even chimed in with a pitch of how we should celebrate.

And people are ready to lavish him with gifts.

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It's strange to see presidential decrees topped off with balloons.

A serious celebration.
A serious celebration.
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Yes, the timing is bad. Or is it good?

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Chelsea Handler hilariously serenaded him, Marilyn Monroe-style, over a montage of his greatest hits.

Of course, his great, obedient children posted earnest, celebratory posts, though Eric's appears more to be an add for Trump Turnberry™.

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And as always, where's Tiffany?

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We are all Tiffany.
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