This is simply unconscionable.

It seems like every year around this time, a million new Thanksgiving recipes come out featuring words like "heirloom" and "gently." Which is sad, because Thanksgiving is about indulgence and laziness, not stress and lentil loaf. It's a time for recipes that feature condensed, canned foods and pre-made frozen pies. It's the only time for those, and we should embrace it as such. That's why I decided to put an end to the madness and revise three particularly egregious recipes for real people—people who don't have pomegranate molasses and walnut oil in their cupboards, people who want food to taste like something resembling food, but cheesier.


1. Roasted Pumpkin Salad from 101 Cookbooks. With just a few simple changes, you can turn this fussy pile of vegetables into a way easier side dish that people will recognize and enjoy eating.


2. Balsamic Braised Brussels with Pancetta from Smitten Kitchen. Now, I love Smitten Kitchen, but sometimes her recipes can involve an excessive number of steps. Have no fear, though! I edited this recipe so it's basically one step.

Sources: 101 Cookbooks | Smitten Kitchen | Oh She Glows