Proof that people who tweet constantly are probably masturbating while they do it.

Proof that people who tweet constantly are probably masturbating while they do it.
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Who knew "jerking around on Twitter all day" was a literal statement.

This graph of user response data from OKCupid isn't all that surprising. We often feel so grossed out by a braggy tweet we feel the need to avert our eyes the way we would from someone masturbating on the subway. The data should go deeper though. For example, we're absolutely certain that not only are people on Twitter going to masturbate today, but they're going to masturbate to the Fav and RT count on one of their more successful tweets. If you watch them trumpet their own twitter success with screencaps posted on Facebook (and announcements about getting picked for HappyPlace.com's Tweet Picks), you get the sense that they've lost the ability to be aroused by mere human nudity long ago. Pick their tweet as "Tweet Of The Day" on Favstar and they probably just spontaneously orgasm without having to touch themselves. If approval is their erotica, by clicking the star on a tweet, or going so far as retweeting, you are their porn.

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