No drunk person should be forced to deal with a two-way zipper.

How did we never realize this before? All J.Crew models look totally wasted. We just needed Drunk J.Crew to bring it to our attention. The excellent Tumblr takes photos of J.Crew models and superimposes their slurred, vodka-fueled words. 

It kind of makes sense that the preppy, buttoned-up women of J.Crew are alcoholics. They probably spend all their time day-drinking at some country club that bases its membership on cheekbone-quality. You and I are not invited. 

Sources: Drunk J. Crew