5. Selena Gomez, because Justin Bieber is creeping on her again.
Justin Bieber and Selena Gomez have been broken up for years. But Bieber keeps proving he is a true 22-year-old millennial by frequently using social media to creepily remind her, and the entire world, of their history. This weekend, he posted a throwback photo on Instagram of the two of them kissing, back when he was a much scrawnier twig of a man.
His fans, of course, went insane. The prospect of a Bieber/Gomez reunion sent them into sleepover levels of excitement. And even Gomez was caught up in it. Proving that their on-again/off-again/please-not-on-again romance may not be dead, she commented on Bieber's post with one word: "Perfect."
So why is she having a worse Monday than you? Because that was yesterday. By now, she must be dealing with a flood of creepy, overly sexual texts from Biebs and his whole PR team. You just can't encourage him like that. It's like inviting a vampire into your house.
4. Bill Murray, because his bracket is busted.
Bill Murray is a major college basketball fan. And it's evidently in his blood—his son Luke is an assistant coach at Xavier University. So, proud papa Murray has been repping Xavier hard during this year's March Madness. He wore their hat during a recent appearance on the Late Show, and he was at their big game against Wisconsin on Sunday.
The game was a nail-biter, and came down to the wire. A last-second three-pointer won the game for Wisconsin, sending all the Xavier fans in attendance into utter shock. The older Murray was no exception, but as an acting legend, his face said it better than anyone.
The loss may have been worth it for that perfect image. Bill Murray can truly sell anything. The Internet immediately went crazy, memeing "Sad Murray" into oblivion:
Poor Bill Murray. He's too funny for his own good. He can't even be sad in peace.
3. Aaron Carter, because he was cyberbullied out of voting for Donald Trump.
Pop star Aaron Carter found his career revitalized recently when a tweet supporting Donald Trump exposed him to a generation of haters who had previously not heard of (or forgot about) him.
Carter was quickly exposed to the full brunt of the Internet's hatred for the silk-haired man. And he may not be as thick-skinned as other former child stars, because in a new interaction with a fan, he claims his intentions have changed. First, a fan named Greer tweeted this sort of sweet message to Carter:
Then he responded:
That's the lesson kids should be taking home. If you're bullied over your political beliefs, just don't vote. Not voting is the cornerstone of our democracy. Thanks, Aaron Carter! You're a true statesman.
2. A guy who was caught by security cameras while he was trying to steal the security cameras.
Thomas Stilwell, an alleged robber in Pleasure Ridge Park, Kentucky, tried to get away with what must have seemed like the perfect crime: stealing security cameras from a laundromat without any tools. But what he failed to realize was that those cameras were cameras, and cameras record your face.
As you can see, the cameras clearly caught Stilwell's face as he hung from them, using his weight to tear them out of the ceiling (like a true cat burglar). He was later arrested. Duh.
1. A guy who was thrown out of a train station while dressed like Waldo.
A man dressed like Waldo from the popular Where's Waldo books was physically removed by police from Boston's South Station on Sunday for being "very disorderly." Transit Police released a photo of the incident on Facebook and Twitter along with a cheeky caption, because cops love a laugh.
He might have gone unnoticed if he had been standing in a train station full of barber poles, candy canes, and other red and white-striped items. But unfortunately, in the real world, Waldo is all too easy to find. Especially when he's causing a drunken ruckus.
According to Boston.com, this unfortunate soul was celebrating a belated St. Patrick's Day, and while that's sad, it still doesn't explain why he was dressed like Waldo. Are kids' books a part of that messed-up holiday now? God help us.