5. Kylie Jenner, because people are calling her out for shaming a paparazza.
Kylie Jenner, the 18-year-old future queen bee of the Kardashian hive, has landed herself in deep honey with a poorly-conceived SnapChat post. The video records a woman taking pictures of Jenner in her car, but it's the young star's commentary that's rubbing fans the wrong way. The SnapChat was preserved and shared by the Instagram account kylizzlesnapchats:
Commenters immediately jumped on Jenner's use of the "B" word, "bitch," as well as her perceived hypocrisy for criticizing the paparazzi even though they're responsible for her family fortune. One wrote, "This WOMAN that you calling 'bitch is the one putting you on magazine covers," which is giving a lot of credit to that particular paparazzo (paparazza?).
Another commenter wrote, "Wow racist and sexist. So much for that bullying campaign and role model," which is weird because Jenner didn't say anything about the woman's race. Is it too much to ask that people get the outrage straight in this story? It's confusing.
4. 50 Cent, because Vivica A. Fox thinks he doth protest too much about "gay stuff."
Vivica A. Fox appeared on Watch What Happens: Live over the weekend to promote her guest starring role in season 2 of Empire. While she was there, host Andy Cohen asked her about comments made by her ex, 50 Cent, blaming the show's dwindling ratings on too much "gay stuff." Watch how she responded:
Yikes! This Fox has claws. Is she really insinuating that Fiddy is a closet homosexual, or is she just hitting him where it hurts, in that way only exes can do? If you need a refresher, here's the magazine cover she was referencing:
She may have a point. Of course, there's nothing inherently embarrassing about this cover (except for being associated with Soulja Boy), but it is pretty hypocritical of 50 Cent to criticize a show on homophobic grounds when this image is on the public record. That didn't stop him from firing back, however, writing on Instagram, "Now she thinks I'm gay because I let her lick my Ass. LMAO."
Since the incident, TMZ reports that Fox has apologized to Soulja Boy, but not to 50. Probably because of the ass line. Or else because he said that the bullet lodged in his tongue is great for oral. There are plenty of reasons.
3. IHOP patrons whose cars were swallowed by a giant sinkhole.
Have you ever eaten too many pancakes and wished the Earth would swallow you whole? Then you might be jealous of customers at an International House of Pancakes in Meridian, Mississippi, who had the next-best/worst thing happen to them. They emerged from the restaurant to find their cars eaten like so many pork sausage links by a sinkhole.
The hole, which at 50 feet wide and 125 feet long is half the size of a football field, opened spontaneously around 7:15 on Saturday night and promptly sunk at least 14 vehicles 30 feet into the mud, where they may sink further. What's more, efforts to lift the cars have been delayed because of rain. It's a situation as sticky as maple syrup and as tragic as fake maple syrup. Luckily, there were no injuries.
To make it even sadder, this IHOP location had only opened for business a week ago. Is this a sign that Meridian is not meant to have an IHOP, or is the local Waffle House just practicing black magic? The world may never know.
2. Kanye West, because he forgot the lyrics to his own song.
Like a good son-in-law, Kanye West went to Kris Jenner's $2 million Great Gatsby-themed 60th birthday party this weekend. And like a good international bestselling rapper, he performed a few of his classic hits while he was there.
At least he tried to. Page Six reports that during the impromptu concert, West was onstage with singer Charlie Wilson when Wilson unexpectedly launched into West's 2010 hit "See Me Now." He passed West the mic to take over, only to have a blank-faced Yeezy admit, "I don't remember the words!" Have the last five years been such a rollercoaster that West doesn't remember his own discography? Yes, obviously.
He's still a pro, though. He quickly transitioned into singing "In Da Club" by 50 Cent. He had no trouble remembering those words, ironically. He even pronounced them correctly, despite the disadvantage of not having a bullet in his tongue. What a trooper.
1. French McDonald's employees shut down for selling weed from the drive-thru.
In a shameless example of the entrepreneurial spirit being senselessly crushed, eight employees at a McDonald's in central France were fired after their colleagues learned that they were operating a pot-dealing ring out of the restaurant. It's perfect synergy, people!
These continental burger-flippeurs had it down to a science. An employee told Le Progrès newspaper, "They were cutting up the weed, weighing it, and bagging it at the salad bar." When customers wanted to make a deal, they would text one of the workers, who would then arrange a time to meet. The customer would order from the drive-thru, and find a little something extra in the bag along with their burgers: illegal drugs.
The operation, which had been running since 2013, was eventually brought down by diminishing standards at the franchise overall. Employees would have long parties in the restaurant after-hours with drugs, alcohol, and gambling. They also were not meeting the health code. One worker told the paper, "Some people were smoking joints, then cooking without washing their hands."
It sounds gross, but in a way it makes perfect sense. If there's one thing in the world that makes people more comfortable with eating fast food with unsanitary preparation, it's weed.