1. Congress Demands Opportunity To Sink U.S.-Iran Nuclear Deal

Members of Congress, angered by the declined opportunity for a brand new war, are demanding an opportunity to go comb through the U.S.-Iran nuclear deal looking for things to complain about on Fox News. "We want the right to go through the details of the deal and to decide whether we believe congressionally mandated sanctions should be alleviated," Sen. Bob Corker told the New York Times.

2. President Obama Has Yet To Visit The Lesser Dakota

Now that Barack Obama has visited Hill Air Force base in Utah, the only state in the union that the President has not visited is South Dakota. We can only assume that this is due to the deep shame that he would feel as the four great presidents of Mount Rushmore looked down upon him.