1. Dick Cheney Dares World To Give Him Another Chance To Rectally Feed A Torture Victim

Former Vice President Dick Cheney appeared on NBC's Meet the Press yesterday in order to justify the Bush administration's use of torture on suspected terrorists, in the wake of a recently released report from the Senate Intelligence Committee. "I'd do it again in a minute," Cheney declared, while valiantly holding back an urge to lunge across the table and tear the throat of host Chuck Todd out with his teeth.