1. Soon-To-Be-Former Pope Excommunicates All Mafiosi From The Catholic Church

Pope Francis yesterday issued a condemnation against all members of the mafia, stating that such criminals "are not in communion with God. They are excommunicated." He was a pretty cool Pope while he lasted, wasn't he?

2. Hank Paulson Uses His Vast Knowledge Of Crashing World Economies To Explain Climate Change