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1. Boko Haram Joins ISIS In Most Insidious Merger Since Comcast-Time Warner

Middle Eastern terrorist organization ISIS has apparently accepted a pledge of allegiance offered by Nigerian terrorist organization Boko Haram. "We announce to you to the good news of the expansion of the caliphate to West Africa because the caliph... has accepted the allegiance of our brothers of the Sunni group for preaching and the jihad," ISIS spokesperson Mohammed al-Adnani declared in a recently released video. It is truly a marriage made in an incredibly fundamentalist interpretation of heaven.