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1. Donald Sterling Is Trying To Use America's Abject Hatred Of Magic Johnson To His Own Advantage 

If there's one thing that Americans hate, it's All-Star-MVP-winning basketball player and AIDS activist Earvin "Magic" Johnson. Knowing this, L.A. Clippers's owner Donald Sterling slyly decided to talk shit on the legendary NBA player during an interview with Anderson Cooper that ran on CNN last night in an apparent effort to win everyone back to his side. "Well, what kind of a guy goes to every city, has sex with every girl, then he catches HIV? Is that someone we want to respect and tell our kids about? I think he should be ashamed of himself," he told Cooper. "I think he should go into the background. But what does he do for the black people? He doesn't do anything." And just like that, nobody's mad at him anymore. Brilliant strategizing!