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1. NFL Findings: New England Patriots Definitely Probably Cheated (Maybe)

An NFL investigative team has definitively found that the New England Patriots might have maybe been purposefully circumventing official rules when they introduced slightly under-inflated footballs into game play during their championship 2014 season. According to a recently released 243-page report, quarterback Tom Brady was "at least generally aware of the inappropriate activities." This minor, overblown incident will likely remain a slightly off-white mark on his reputation for months to come.