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1. Nation Shocked And Saddened To Discover That Ferguson Incident Ended As Depressingly As Everyone Expected It Would

After last night's depressing grand jury decision against indicting Ferguson, Missouri police officer Darren Wilson and the community's equally depressing response to it, many U.S. citizens woke up this morning feeling exactly as depressed as they were afraid they were going to feel when they learned yesterday that a decision was pending. However, things are now getting even more depressing, as news comes that more U.S. troops are being sent into Ferguson to supposedly quell continued civil unrest. Plus, President Obama's depressingly uninspiring statement on the matter didn't help any.