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1. The World Will Have To Slather Its Hyper-Caloric Meat Patties With Some Other Type Of Sugary-Tomato Slurry — McDonald’s And Heinz Parting Ways

McDonald restaurants worldwide will stop providing Heinz ketchup for its customers, possibly due to the appointment of former Burger King CEO Bernardo Hees as new chief of H. J. Heinz Company this past June. The decision will certainly anger many fast food customers, who will likely not be at all assuaged to learn that McDonald’s actually stopped using Heinz ketchup in U.S. locations many years ago.