Twitter's losing it over this NSFW statue of a boy and his well-endowed dog.
A sculpture of a boy and his dog has made the internet's eyes pop because of one, um, anatomically creative aspect of the little kid's dachshund. There's no other way to say it: he's got a massive willy.
Actually, there are thousands of ways to say it, but you can see a plaque in the background of the photo that says ... "and Willie."
Here's the sculpture:
Here's the sign in the background:
Here's the part you're looking at:
I feel confident that I've tracked down the info behind the statue, a bronze sculpture at Prospect Park in Brooklyn, New York called "Peter & Willie." The photo on the government website cleverly obscures the most notable part of the dog, but a search of the internet seems to confirm that there is no photoshopping here.
In reality, the sculpture depicts two characters from a children's book called Peter's Chair by Brooklyn-born author Ezra Jack Keats.
The book's from 1967, but rest assured that dogs were not evolutionarily massive in the, uhhhhh, penis-area in the '60s. A quick glimpse through the children's book shows that the cartoon dachshund in the kid's literature is not only less-endowed, but completely smooth on the underside. As it should be, thank god. You can take a look for yourself over on Amazon.
Another quick Google search proves that the artist's depiction of a dachshund is not true-to-life, again, thank god. Here is a more average version of the breed. So the most notable appendage of the statue seems to come purely from the imagination of the sculptor, Otto Neals.
To put it bluntly, Neals gave Willie a serious willy. It's sufficiently alarmed everyone who's seen it.
One more thing, remember how most sculptures of ancient men have tiny dicks?
Art historian Ellen Oredsson said "cultural values about male beauty were completely different back then... back then, most evidence points to the fact that small penises were considered better than big ones."
Someone tell Big Willie.