Tonight's Powerball jackpot is up to $1.5 billion, and everyone's talking about what they'd do with the money if they won. Some are dreaming of mansions in Tuscany, while others are vowing to end poverty in more or less effective ways. We here at Someecards are, at heart, humanitarians, and we know exactly what we'll do if we win: stop writing about the Kardashians.
Every time we write a story about the Kardashians and their shapely bottoms, their pregnancies, or their New Year's resolutions, we face a crisis of conscience. We know some of you hate reading about them, but for some reason, a lot of you also love reading about them. There's something magical about the word "Kardashian" that makes everybody need to see the post immediately, and we have no choice but to give our readers what they want (even if they claim to be kicking and screaming all the way to our website).
But once we win, we'll finally have the freedom to stop reporting on the Kardashians and start reporting on the things that really matter: the Syrian refugee crisis, the devastating impact of climate change, and whatever Kristen Bell is up to.
We're determined to use the money for good and "stop making stupid people famous." What would you do if you won?