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It's fine to open up on Facebook—even about weird stuff. For better or for worse, that's where a lot of friendships exist now, and so it's only natural that we'd reach out to the people we love and care about on that platform.

Still, if you find yourself posting multiple updates about your sex doll over the course of a single day, maybe take a deep breath and reconsider. Sure, you may feel in control of the narrative at any given moment, but to everyone else, it looks like you're in the middle of a horny nervous breakdown.

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A wild ride? This was life-changing. I have to go back and take it all in again.

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Receiving a sex doll as a "compliment," trying to sell the sex doll's skeleton for meth money, admitting that you tore the sex doll's vagina while having sex with it... this story has everything. If only Chekhov were alive to read it.