Olympic closing ceremony outfits make Team USA look like prep school kids on spring break.

Olympic closing ceremony outfits make Team USA look like prep school kids on spring break.
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The Olympic uniforms for Team USA were released on Wednesday, and they would be great if America only competed in the sailing and tennis events. Actually, they'd be perfect if America only competed in polo. Speaking of polo, the uniforms were designed by Ralph Lauren, and they look very much like a vintage Ralph Lauren ad from the 1980s. Here are the Team USA uniforms for the closing ceremonies:

Here are some vintage Ralph Lauren ads circa 1982:

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Can't be bothered.
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Wolves of Wall Street.

The uniforms even look like they were inspired by the movie The Talented Mr. Ripley:

#mcm #judelaw #dickiegreenleaf #talentedmrripley #instagay #mancrushmonday

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There are ways to sport red, white, and/or blue without looking like a rich bully. Check out the uniforms from some of our allies in the free world with similar colors:

France

Canada

Great Britain

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Team USA has already suffered defeat in the fashion event. Hopefully top American athletes earn enough medals to put around their necks and cover up those goofy polo shirts.

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