Send this article with your "Regretfully Decline" RSVPs to wedding invites.
(Mugshot via WYFF4.com)
Got friends getting married soon who don't seem to care about how many marriages end in divorce? Tell them the story of married South Carolina man Marvin Holmes II, who was picked up for soliciting a prostitute last week because he was "having trouble with his wife." Not that unique a story, but to add fatal insult to injury, Holmes told police he and the prostitute went to Apache Pawn together so he could pawn his wedding ring to get the twenty bucks she required before she would render services.
It's not the act of soliciting that bothers us so much as the hit-us-over-the-head symbolism. He couldn't have pawned a juicer someone bought him off their registry? Or even something slightly more subtle, like his wedding tux? He had to go full-on wedding ring just to make painfully clear in the divorce filing with the state of South Carolina that "these differences are way beyond irreconcilable, like 'pawning my wedding band for street-side hookers' irreconcilable." Maybe Holmes and his prostitute will find they were meant to be, and raise the money to get that wedding band back for a little nuptials of their own.