On Sunday, a Cincinnati man stripped naked and totally pooped on a self-checkout scanner at a Kroger grocery store. He was charged with public indecency and disorderly conduct, and is now a folk hero for anyone that hates self-checkout scanners.
The suspect, Colin Murphy, strolled into the Kroger, removed his clothes, and got to work pretty quickly. He was also reportedly super drunk. Hopefully, he was blacked-out, so somebody got to explain to him what he did when he woke up (though technically this might be called a brown-out).
The judge also banned him from that Kroger. But there are still plenty of other grocery stores and drug stores he could defile in the Cincinnati area.