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On Sunday, a Cincinnati man stripped naked and totally pooped on a self-checkout scanner at a Kroger grocery store. He was charged with public indecency and disorderly conduct, and is now a folk hero for anyone that hates self-checkout scanners.

The suspect, Colin Murphy, strolled into the Kroger, removed his clothes, and got to work pretty quickly. He was also reportedly super drunk. Hopefully, he was blacked-out, so somebody got to explain to him what he did when he woke up (though technically this might be called a brown-out).

The number one criminal in Cincinnati for going number two.
The number one criminal in Cincinnati for going number two.
Hamilton County Sheriff's Dept.
Sources: The Smoking Fun