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A student named McKenna Clark turned in a paper on criminal justice that she wrote while drunk—not just drunk, but full on "white girl wasted." Puking-in-an-Uber, texting-your-ex, ordering-Seamless-then-passing-out-before-it-arrives wasted. You get it.

McKenna was apparently still super-drunk from the night before when she wrote and then turned in this essay. She later posted it on Twitter after she (presumably) sobered up as a warning to others. Or maybe she's still drunk, we don't know. The essay went viral because it's hilarious. There's even a surprise twist at the end:

Sources: Twitter