The hardest part of being a babysitter is dealing with overprotective parents. On the other hand, jaded parents who totally DGAF are a joy. That must be why everyone on the internet is in love with this hilariously sarcastic note left for a young babysitter by a mom who has long since stopped keeping up appearances. The note was shared on Twitter, where it quickly went viral. It's definitely funny, although we hope most of it is a joke. There's some heavy stuff in here.
The note reads:
Rules & Tips
1) I encourage the kids to watch as much TV as possible, so they will leave me the hell alone. Feel free to do the same.
2) Don’t waste your valuable time cooking or providing healthy snacks. Just give them the pizza and snacks I leave.
3) They do still breastfeed on demand. Just download a video on YouTube. It’s not hard or I would not do it.
4) Do not take any kittens/candy/puppies from *****. Or take a ride in his van.
5) If any of my neighbors come to the door, treat them like Jehovah’s Witnesses. Don’t lend them any eggs/milk/cigarettes. They know where the store is. And no, you don’t want to babysit for them.
6) Let the kids have as much sugar as they want, as long as they will go away. They take pills to sleep anyway.
7) If you have any boys over just make sure they have an uncle/dad/brother/friend that I can call later.
8) Don’t answer the house phone unless you feel like paying bills.
9) If you look through my drawers, please throw away any overdue bills and gum wrappers.
10) Do not believe ANYTHING the kids tell you.
Ah, the joy of motherhood.