Kids

Kids have no filter, which makes them funnier than most professional comedians. But as funny as it can be when a kid marches around dropping brutal truth bombs in public, it&#39;s not always as funny for their parents, who have to deal with the repercussions of their kids&#39; actions and words. Being publicly humiliated is a big part of being a parent. But luckily these mortifying moments are often pretty hilarious after the initial shame has subsided.Someone <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/5a0mix/parents_of_reddit_whats_something_your_kid_did/" target="_blank">asked</a> parents of Reddit: &quot;What&#39;s something your kid did that mortified you in public but seems hilarious in retrospect?&quot;<h2>These 20 parents share their funniest stories of being publicly humiliated by their kids that they can laugh at now that some time has passed:</h2>1.) From [deleted]:<blockquote> When my daughter was three she had just learned about Obama. So on our first outting to the store after that, the first black man she sees she shouts &quot;Its Obama!&quot; </blockquote>2.) From <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/smw89/">smw89</a>:<div className="ad-splitter"></div><blockquote> I was at a friend&#39;s house. They were having a BBQ. Lots of people over. All the kids were playing in the bedroom upstairs. My four-year-old daughter came flying down the stairs and ran into the bathroom. All the adults are hanging out in the living room, which you have to pass to get from bathroom to staircase. Anyways, she leaves the bathroom, pops her head in the living room and said, &quot;I didn&#39;t have to wipe because my pee cleaned my butt for me!&quot; Everyone roared with laughter, and my buddy told me I better go make her wipe her ass. </blockquote>3.) From <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/KinseyH/">KinseyH</a>:<blockquote> Good friends of mine were at the mall with their son, who was about five. An elderly little person walked by and the 5 yo yelled &quot;Guys! Guys! I just saw a baby grandma!&quot; </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div>4.) From <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/JitGoinHam/">JitGoinHam</a>:<blockquote> A few Halloweens ago while shopping in Target my son exclaimed &quot;woah! nice ninja costume&quot; as we passed a woman wearing a hijab. </blockquote>5.) From <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/BlueMacaw/">BlueMacaw</a>:<blockquote> As we were going through airport security, the TSA agent asked my 5-year old son if we were his parents. He deadpanned, &quot;I&#39;ve never seen them before in my life.&quot; Hilarious now; not so funny at the time. </blockquote>6.) From <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/spenardagain/">spenardagain</a>:<blockquote> My then 4-yo plulled off his swim trunks and yelled &quot;IT&#39;S PENIS TIME!!!&quot; Not exactly in public since he was in our yard, but the neighbors who were in their yard definitely saw and heard. His younger brother, also at age 4, ran to the end of our driveway, pulled down his pants, and started arcing pee right into the street. He must have really had to go because there was time for several people to drive by. </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div>7.) From <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/capnawsumpants/">capnawsumpants</a>:<blockquote> When my sister was little, she pronounced her Ts like Fs. My grandma had a dog named tucker. One day we saw a dog like him at the store and she yelled &quot;look! It&#39;s f**ker!!&quot; </blockquote>8.) From <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/bonniefloss/">bonniefloss</a>:<blockquote> Out in the city one day and mum had to go to the bathroom. Took me into the cubicle, cos you know, cities are dangerous and stuff. Anyway, turns out she unexpectedly had Aunt Flo to visit, which scared the bejeezus outta me. She gave me a brief explanation to abate the fear, and we carried on with our day. A few hours later it was obviously still on my mind... We were waiting at the bus stop and I walked up to the handsome young man who was also waiting, tugged on the bottom of his shirt, looked up at him - all innocence - and said &quot;My mummy&#39;s bleeding. In her pants.&quot; Poor mum. So mortified. She picked me up, and ran to the next bus stop, hid behind it till the bus went past, then caught the next one. </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div>9.) From <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/mistresshelga/">mistresshelga</a>:<blockquote> Climbed out of public pool, walked into grass, squatted down and peed. </blockquote>10.) From <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/like_the_rest_of_us/">like_the_rest_of_us</a>:<blockquote> When my niece was about four, the family got together to watch a football game. My friend, an avid cyclist, came over to the house to join. He was wearing one of those extremely tight cycling leotards that doesn&#39;t leave much to the imagination. Unfortunately, my niece was right about eye level with his waist. When he said &quot;it&#39;s nice to meet you,&quot; she poked him right in the crotch and asked &quot;what&#39;s that?!&quot; He didn&#39;t come around much after that. </blockquote>11.) From <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/mrs-darling/">mrs-darling</a>:<blockquote> My daughter was about two and potty training; had just taught her about deciphering public bathroom signs. &quot;This one has a little dress. This is girls. This is where you and mommy go. This one has pants. This is for boys...&quot; etc. Next week I&#39;m juggling stroller, a six month old, and my toddler, and the moment we sit to eat happy meals my girl has to go. Like now. We sprint to McDonald&#39;s bathroom, she find the right outer door, walks in, and loses her mind on the person waiting for the next available stall. </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div><blockquote> &quot;Dis is the giwls room. It has a dwess outside the door. You (pointing angrily) need to go next dooh over derh (pointing angrily again towards the exit) to the boys.&quot; She was telling off a bald person. A bald woman. Obviously very sick with cancer/chemo. In a wheelchair. Being pushed by her nurse. Waiting for the handicapped stall. </blockquote><blockquote> I was horrified. Apologised profusely. They were thankfully kind, understanding, and actually had a bit of chuckle. Ahh toddlers. It still makes me cringe to think of. </blockquote>12.) From <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/jenglasser/">jenglasser</a>:<blockquote> Well, this was my niece, but when she was about 18 months she would combine the words &quot;car&quot; and &quot;truck&quot;. Every time I took her out she would yell &quot;COCK!&quot; when she saw a vehicle. It was mortifying at the time, but now I tell that story to everyone, lol. </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div>13.) From <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/lordperiwinkle/">lordperiwinkle</a>:<blockquote> years ago when my youngest was not quite three, we were at a hotel. I took the kids down to the pool. There was a large number of high school kids there, members of a track team, traveled from out of state for a regional meet. My kid was too small and too chilly for the pool, so I took him over to the jacuzzi. One of the teens came over...a very tall, slender young man, with dark brown skin. My kid was fascinated...enthralled. At that age he had no filters. </blockquote><blockquote> He sidled up and began making friends, pointed out that his skin was a different color, asked him how he got his. When I began to hush my kid the guy laughed and said it was all right, that he was reminded of his younger siblings whom he was missing. The young man was an exchange student from Jamaica, sent to Colorado. He had just seen snow for the first time. The two of them, being humans together is a good memory. </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div>14.) From <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/LiquidArrogance/">LiquidArrogance</a>:<blockquote> When my son was a few weeks old we got our first Costco membership. I&#39;d just gotten a new job. New baby. Costco membership. We felt like we were adulting hard AF. The first thing you do when you walk into Costco is go look at all the TVs you can&#39;t afford. My wife was holding the baby and somehow his diaper slid sideways. </blockquote><blockquote> He shat and the entirety of it splattered all over the TV aisle in Costco. Newborn / infant poo isn&#39;t like regular poo ... it was like a giant pterodactyl birdshit if the pterodactyl ate mustard and cottage cheese for two days straight. The Costco employee was super cool about it. Said he has six kids and joked with us while he mopped it up. We still left immediately and were mortified. Three years later and we still see the employee in Costco on occasion . . . we all still joke about it. </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div>15.) From <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/923PoP/">923PoP</a>:<blockquote> I was heavily pregnant, due date a few days a way, and went out for a burger and ice cream sundae with my friend. Ordered, then noticed something uncomfortable as I shifted in my seat. I told my friend, &quot;I&#39;m just going to run to the bathroom before our food comes.&quot; I stood up and my water broke. Quickly sat back down to sort of &quot;cork&quot; the flow and was paralyzed as to what to do. </blockquote><blockquote> We called over our waiter and I told him my water just broke and we wouldn&#39;t be able to stay for our dinner. He was so excited for me at first, and then as the reality set in of the biohazard mess he was going to have to clean up, I could see his expression shift to being horrified and disgusted, then he quickly tried to pretend to be excited again. So, I wrapped my friend&#39;s sweater around my waste, and we hustled out without paying as water gushed down the legs of my pants. So gross!! So, my daughter mortified me in public before she was even born. I hope this is not a foreshadowing of things to come... </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div>16.) From <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/G4rve/">G4rve</a>:<blockquote> When my son was around 3 we were walking around the small town I&#39;m from with him on my shoulders. We turned one corner to find a funeral group outside a church standing sombrely, watching as the coffin was loaded into the hearse. </blockquote><blockquote> My son spotted someone he knew in the group. I knew he&#39;d call to them so turned to walk back the way we&#39;d come. I felt him twisting on my shoulders, and just as the hearse drove slowly off heard my son&#39;s shrill voice shouting as loud as he could, &quot;Byeee..!, Byeee..!&quot; </blockquote>17.) From <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/dorkmagnet123/">dorkmagnet123</a>:<blockquote> When my son was about four we were in line at Wendy&#39;s when a bunch of national guardsmen came in full fatigues. My son was obsessed with GI JOE. He begins yelling mom it&#39;s GI JOE! Then proceeds asking them where Snake Eyes was. I&#39;m dying of embarrassment until they tell him that he wasn&#39;t on this mission and then ask if they can take him out to show him the trucks and equipment. My son talked about nothing else for weeks. Our service men and women rock! </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div>18.) From <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/CapedVerdian/">CapedVerdian</a>:<blockquote> My son is almost 3 and has taken it upon himself to play wingman for me, even though I am married and he clearly loves his dad. So, I am black and my husband is white. Usually he&#39;ll point at pictures of black models on magazines and say &quot;Mommy&quot;. I&#39;m not going to correct that :-). It becomes embarrassing when he points to random white guys and yells &quot;Daddy, Daddy&quot; with a smile. I&#39;m almost certain he knows what he is doing. </blockquote>19.) From <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/berthejew/">berthejew</a>:<blockquote> Shopping with my then three year old daughter and mother. Burlington Coat Factory, if it matters- the racks were all very short and you could see throughout the store,, as well as hear. My daughter saw a lady smiling at her a few rows over and said loudly, &quot;Look mama, that ladies&#39; teeth are SUCH a pretty yellow!&quot; She quit smiling. </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div>20.) From <a href="https://www.reddit.com/user/TygerTygerr/">TygerTygerr</a>:<blockquote> The one and only time I brought her swimming, she got sick in the pool and it had to be evacuated. </blockquote><div className="ad-splitter"></div>

20 parents share the most mortifying thing their kid said or did in public.

Kids have no filter, which makes them funnier than most professional comedians. But as funny as it can be when a kid marches around dropping brutal truth bombs in public, it&#39;s not always as funny for their parents, who have to deal with the repercussions of their kids&#39; actions and words. Being publicly humiliated is a big part of being a parent. But luckily these mortifying moments are often pretty hilarious after the initial shame has subsided.Someone asked parents of Reddit: &quot;What&#39;s something your kid did that mortified you in public but seems hilarious in retrospect?&quot;These 20 parents share their funniest stories of being publicly humiliated by their kids that they can laugh at now that some time has passed:1.) From [deleted]: When my daughter was three she had just learned about Obama. So on our first outting to the store after that, the first black man she sees she shouts &quot;Its Obama!&quot; 2.) From smw89: I was at a friend&#39;s house. They were having a BBQ. Lots of people over. All the kids were playing in the bedroom upstairs. My four-year-old daughter came flying down the stairs and ran into the bathroom. All the adults are hanging out in the living room, which you have to pass to get from bathroom to staircase. Anyways, she leaves the bathroom, pops her head in the living room and said, &quot;I didn&#39;t have to wipe because my pee cleaned my butt for me!&quot; Everyone roared with laughter, and my buddy told me I better go make her wipe her ass. 3.) From KinseyH: Good friends of mine were at the mall with their son, who was about five. An elderly little person walked by and the 5 yo yelled &quot;Guys! Guys! I just saw a baby grandma!&quot; 4.) From JitGoinHam: A few Halloweens ago while shopping in Target my son exclaimed &quot;woah! nice ninja costume&quot; as we passed a woman wearing a hijab. 5.) From BlueMacaw: As we were going through airport security, the TSA agent asked my 5-year old son if we were his parents. He deadpanned, &quot;I&#39;ve never seen them before in my life.&quot; Hilarious now; not so funny at the time. 6.) From spenardagain: My then 4-yo plulled off his swim trunks and yelled &quot;IT&#39;S PENIS TIME!!!&quot; Not exactly in public since he was in our yard, but the neighbors who were in their yard definitely saw and heard. His younger brother, also at age 4, ran to the end of our driveway, pulled down his pants, and started arcing pee right into the street. He must have really had to go because there was time for several people to drive by. 7.) From capnawsumpants: When my sister was little, she pronounced her Ts like Fs. My grandma had a dog named tucker. One day we saw a dog like him at the store and she yelled &quot;look! It&#39;s f**ker!!&quot; 8.) From bonniefloss: Out in the city one day and mum had to go to the bathroom. Took me into the cubicle, cos you know, cities are dangerous and stuff. Anyway, turns out she unexpectedly had Aunt Flo to visit, which scared the bejeezus outta me. She gave me a brief explanation to abate the fear, and we carried on with our day. A few hours later it was obviously still on my mind... We were waiting at the bus stop and I walked up to the handsome young man who was also waiting, tugged on the bottom of his shirt, looked up at him - all innocence - and said &quot;My mummy&#39;s bleeding. In her pants.&quot; Poor mum. So mortified. She picked me up, and ran to the next bus stop, hid behind it till the bus went past, then caught the next one. 9.) From mistresshelga: Climbed out of public pool, walked into grass, squatted down and peed. 10.) From like_the_rest_of_us: When my niece was about four, the family got together to watch a football game. My friend, an avid cyclist, came over to the house to join. He was wearing one of those extremely tight cycling leotards that doesn&#39;t leave much to the imagination. Unfortunately, my niece was right about eye level with his waist. When he said &quot;it&#39;s nice to meet you,&quot; she poked him right in the crotch and asked &quot;what&#39;s that?!&quot; He didn&#39;t come around much after that. 11.) From mrs-darling: My daughter was about two and potty training; had just taught her about deciphering public bathroom signs. &quot;This one has a little dress. This is girls. This is where you and mommy go. This one has pants. This is for boys...&quot; etc. Next week I&#39;m juggling stroller, a six month old, and my toddler, and the moment we sit to eat happy meals my girl has to go. Like now. We sprint to McDonald&#39;s bathroom, she find the right outer door, walks in, and loses her mind on the person waiting for the next available stall.  &quot;Dis is the giwls room. It has a dwess outside the door. You (pointing angrily) need to go next dooh over derh (pointing angrily again towards the exit) to the boys.&quot; She was telling off a bald person. A bald woman. Obviously very sick with cancer/chemo. In a wheelchair. Being pushed by her nurse. Waiting for the handicapped stall.  I was horrified. Apologised profusely. They were thankfully kind, understanding, and actually had a bit of chuckle. Ahh toddlers. It still makes me cringe to think of. 12.) From jenglasser: Well, this was my niece, but when she was about 18 months she would combine the words &quot;car&quot; and &quot;truck&quot;. Every time I took her out she would yell &quot;COCK!&quot; when she saw a vehicle. It was mortifying at the time, but now I tell that story to everyone, lol. 13.) From lordperiwinkle: years ago when my youngest was not quite three, we were at a hotel. I took the kids down to the pool. There was a large number of high school kids there, members of a track team, traveled from out of state for a regional meet. My kid was too small and too chilly for the pool, so I took him over to the jacuzzi. One of the teens came over...a very tall, slender young man, with dark brown skin. My kid was fascinated...enthralled. At that age he had no filters.  He sidled up and began making friends, pointed out that his skin was a different color, asked him how he got his. When I began to hush my kid the guy laughed and said it was all right, that he was reminded of his younger siblings whom he was missing. The young man was an exchange student from Jamaica, sent to Colorado. He had just seen snow for the first time. The two of them, being humans together is a good memory. 14.) From LiquidArrogance: When my son was a few weeks old we got our first Costco membership. I&#39;d just gotten a new job. New baby. Costco membership. We felt like we were adulting hard AF. The first thing you do when you walk into Costco is go look at all the TVs you can&#39;t afford. My wife was holding the baby and somehow his diaper slid sideways.  He shat and the entirety of it splattered all over the TV aisle in Costco. Newborn / infant poo isn&#39;t like regular poo ... it was like a giant pterodactyl birdshit if the pterodactyl ate mustard and cottage cheese for two days straight. The Costco employee was super cool about it. Said he has six kids and joked with us while he mopped it up. We still left immediately and were mortified. Three years later and we still see the employee in Costco on occasion . . . we all still joke about it. 15.) From 923PoP: I was heavily pregnant, due date a few days a way, and went out for a burger and ice cream sundae with my friend. Ordered, then noticed something uncomfortable as I shifted in my seat. I told my friend, &quot;I&#39;m just going to run to the bathroom before our food comes.&quot; I stood up and my water broke. Quickly sat back down to sort of &quot;cork&quot; the flow and was paralyzed as to what to do.  We called over our waiter and I told him my water just broke and we wouldn&#39;t be able to stay for our dinner. He was so excited for me at first, and then as the reality set in of the biohazard mess he was going to have to clean up, I could see his expression shift to being horrified and disgusted, then he quickly tried to pretend to be excited again. So, I wrapped my friend&#39;s sweater around my waste, and we hustled out without paying as water gushed down the legs of my pants. So gross!! So, my daughter mortified me in public before she was even born. I hope this is not a foreshadowing of things to come... 16.) From G4rve: When my son was around 3 we were walking around the small town I&#39;m from with him on my shoulders. We turned one corner to find a funeral group outside a church standing sombrely, watching as the coffin was loaded into the hearse.  My son spotted someone he knew in the group. I knew he&#39;d call to them so turned to walk back the way we&#39;d come. I felt him twisting on my shoulders, and just as the hearse drove slowly off heard my son&#39;s shrill voice shouting as loud as he could, &quot;Byeee..!, Byeee..!&quot; 17.) From dorkmagnet123: When my son was about four we were in line at Wendy&#39;s when a bunch of national guardsmen came in full fatigues. My son was obsessed with GI JOE. He begins yelling mom it&#39;s GI JOE! Then proceeds asking them where Snake Eyes was. I&#39;m dying of embarrassment until they tell him that he wasn&#39;t on this mission and then ask if they can take him out to show him the trucks and equipment. My son talked about nothing else for weeks. Our service men and women rock! 18.) From CapedVerdian: My son is almost 3 and has taken it upon himself to play wingman for me, even though I am married and he clearly loves his dad. So, I am black and my husband is white. Usually he&#39;ll point at pictures of black models on magazines and say &quot;Mommy&quot;. I&#39;m not going to correct that :-). It becomes embarrassing when he points to random white guys and yells &quot;Daddy, Daddy&quot; with a smile. I&#39;m almost certain he knows what he is doing. 19.) From berthejew: Shopping with my then three year old daughter and mother. Burlington Coat Factory, if it matters- the racks were all very short and you could see throughout the store,, as well as hear. My daughter saw a lady smiling at her a few rows over and said loudly, &quot;Look mama, that ladies&#39; teeth are SUCH a pretty yellow!&quot; She quit smiling. 20.) From TygerTygerr: The one and only time I brought her swimming, she got sick in the pool and it had to be evacuated. 

Kids have no filter, which makes them funnier than most professional comedians. But as funny as it can be when a kid marches around dropping brutal truth bombs in public, it&#39;s not always as funny for their parents, who have to deal...