Welcome to This Week in GOOP, where Gwyneth Paltrow's condescension is strong enough for a man but made for a woman.

As you've probably heard by now, Gwynnie tried and failed to feed herself for a week on just $29 as part of the #FoodBankNYCChallenge. And while there are a billion jokes I could make about that – including wondering why the hell her grocery haul included seven limes for one week when the only time I've ever used that many so fast was when they were accompanied by a shaker of salt and a bottle of tequila – alas, I can't give her too much shit about it.

Sources: GOOP