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Harlem rapper Azealia Banks sought to prove her authenticity as a witch yesterday by posting a gruesome video to Instagram of a bloody closet strewn with feathers. "The amount of crap that's about to come off my floor right you now guys, oh my god," she said in a clip that has since disappeared from her account but resurfaced elsewhere on social media, much to everyone's horror.

She claims the mess was the result of three years of brujería, a style of witchcraft akin to voodoo or santería that can involve animal sacrifice. It was widely assumed that Banks had been killing chickens in the closet. After busting out a sandblaster and putting on goggles, she quipped, "Real witches do real things."

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The response to this revelation was, shall we say, mixed.

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Hey, who doesn't want to go into the new year with a fresh, clean start?